Feedback and Opinions

Do you receive feedback often? Is it something you can use?

As Marcus Aurelius once wrote “I have often wondered how it is that every man loves himself more than all the rest of men, but yet sets less value on his own opinion of himself than on the opinion of others.”

There is a difference between constructive feedback, unconstructive feedback, opinion and noise we receive from others. I sometimes find it hard to be able to distinguish between all the different forms of feedback we get from others especially if we respect the other person who is giving it to us. No matter what the feedback you receive be polite and always say thank you.

I try and ask some of the following questions of the feedback when I receive it to try to ensure that its valid;

Is my opinion of this person (positive or negative) influencing my reaction to the feedback?

This allows you to try to see if your biased towards this person and try to remove the bias in this situation. Being biased could let go good feedback or waste your energy focusing on the unconstructive feedback that adds no value.

https://www.yourbias.is/ is a great site for 24 of the most common bias's you may see or be influenced by.

Does this person hold a bias in this situation?

Is the person biased when they gave you the feedback, is it possible they are suffering from any bias that may impinge on the true nature of the feedback they have given.

How can I use this feedback for growth?

Some feedback may be good but it might not be useful right now or the feedback is good for that situation but it was an outlier and your energy is better spent on other feedback, what gives you "best bang for your buck", again we have limited resources we can use to correct and grow ourselves on the journey. If need be, park it for another time.

Other strategies you could employ;

Seek feedback from another source on the same information.

Ok not a question but if you are still struggling to validate feedback is to reframe from another's point of view, now viewed in a different light has the intent of the feedback changed?

Ask them Questions

Ask the person/s giving the feedback questions to try and better understand the feedback given, some may include, can you give me an example of XYZ?, can you expand on XYZ?, what would you do differently if you were in my shoes?

I hope some of these point/s help you on your journey.

Enjoy Growth,

Mitch